I want to write a quick story about the word hosed, a fairly popular slang word for extremely unfortunate situations. The type of unfortunate situation is highly dependent on context. If you perhaps make a large bet on a sporting event that you can not afford to pay, and your team is down by an unreconcilable amount in the last moments of the game, you might describe yourself as hosed meaning you are about to be in debt. You may also describe the team losing the game at this point as hosed, meaning they have no chance at victory. However, my most relevant usage would be to technology, as I work in tech support. A computer with extreme spyware issues that cripples the systems resources, networking, etc. would be hosed.
Unfortunately, this is still a slang term, and considered unprofessional to use when speaking with clients. I have toyed around with the idea for a long time that I wanted to create meaning for HOSED as an acronym that could be used to present it as a valid technical term.
Today, having returned to work this week from my sabbatical very refreshed, I finally sat down and worked out a very nice meaning for this:
"Harsh Operation, System, or Equipment Disruption."
And for those of you that are concerned about making the meaning and usage fit grammatically, this can easily be accomplished by making it 4 adverbs and a verb with Harshly Operationally, Systematically, or Equipmentally Disrupted. Sure, equipmentally isn't technically a word, but who's going to know?
So, those of you who work in a technical field and have to watch what you say with your clients can begin to justify this acronym. Just using this as proper terminology a little bit should get the ball rolling, and in no time you can let your clients know how truly HOSED their systems really are.
The Point Blank Critic
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